Mr and presumably Mrs Mole have invaded the playing field in a fairly substantial manner. It is nice to see a bit of nature taking place but we nimbies don’t take kindly to our furry friend, who, in the wrong place, quickly becomes a furry fiend.
It’s a bit like having teenagers at home – you never see them, but you sure notice where they have been! Lumps and bumps abound, which present a trip hazard in the eyes of the elfin safety when kids are hurtling about in the playing field. Anybody with mole banishment skills are welcome to speak to the parish council with ideas. The use of explosives has been ruled out as it tends to launch great chunks of the playing field somewhere else. Inviting Jasper Carrot, the comedian, whom you may recall attempted to solve his problem by sitting on a stool at night armed with a torch and shot gun is one idea.
Another idea to flattening the hummocks is to hold a Morris Dancing festival, maybe including those clog dancers from Lancashire, wherever that is.